With the economy sucking the way it is, I was struggling as much as anybody. Then I heard all this stuff about this stimulis plan and the government just printing boatloads of money to bail out banks and stuff. It hurt to know they weren’t going to be sending any of that money to me, I started feeling sorry for myself. Then it hit me! Why don’t I just print the money I need? Just like congress does? I got a computer and a printer right? So print I did! I haven’t been so stimulated in all my life! I literally have cash hanging from the walls as you can see. So how do YOU get started? Just follow the easy steps below, in as little as 20 minutes your cash problem will be a thing of the past.

STEP 1 - Borrow some large bills from a friend who has some, (20’s or 50’s work best) and scan them into your computer. Don’t forget to scan the backs too, I forgot once and people noticed.

STEP 2 - Begin printing your money. This is most easily achieved if you have a combi- nation copy/printer. Once again don’t forget to do the backs too.

STEP 3 - Cut out your money and (this is important) hang it up to dry. You don’t want the colors to run now do you?

STEP 4 - This is the best step.....SPEND! Now that you have all the money you want, treat yourself to whatever the fuck you want! If you run out, do like the government and just print more! Its like Monopoly Money except people think its REAL!